Unified Soviet Red Assault Command Biochemistry Conscript

"Oh my. The Unified Soviet Red Assault Command's got us stranded with its very own Biochemistry Conscripts! Geez wiz! Why?! Well, I've gotta stop them before they could reach to my village and they would see us contaminated with something that the Preschool Girls have made! And fast."

--Su Ji-Hoon, Mother Russia Bleeds Again